Postscript
How to Measure Political Power
The world is becoming smaller, warmer and more and more materialistic. It's all about instant gratification, self-promotion, taking short cuts and getting high on power trips. Feeding the Ego has become the fastest growing religion with its universal appeal, easy accessibility and seductive allure. People, no matter, what age, colour or creed cannot resist the rush of pleasure from knowing that they are somehow better than others. Politicians, in particular, find that power comes automatically with the appointment letter. But how does one determine the level of power?
A few telltale signs will reveal a politician's power quotient.
The number of times your sycophants spew 'Yes Sir!', 'No Sir!' 'You are hundred percent correct Sir' or just plain 'Sir'. The higher the number, the more power you wield. You can test this by saying the most ridiculous things like “let's call a truce with our opponents and then make sure it is unacceptable to them so we can continue squabbling like demented monkeys.”
You can get the most jam-packed road to be free of all ordinary folk and their vehicles in a matter of minutes when you go to office.
You have hundreds of people sweating away outside your office, waiting for that signature that will 'push the file' and allow them to sell their land/encroach upon the land of others or public water bodies, get their pension or free their sociopath son from jail.
Your security protocol is like a bridal party replete with dozens of ninja-warriors with Rayban sunglasses, extra Pajeros carrying your personal goons, hairdresser and valet/maid in waiting and a brand new, shiny ambulance.
Your 'commission' from desperate businessmen is not in lakhs but crores.
You can, at the drop of a hat, get all the schoolchildren of the town/village you are visiting, to line up, sing high-pitched welcome songs and throw rose petals on you, despite the scorching sun and outrage of parents.
You can call a hartal just for the heck of it and the streets will be empty the next day. This is because you can get your goons to terrorise the ordinary folk by burning buses, smashing cars and getting a few of them killed.
You can publicly make the most crass, vile and vindictive comments against your opponent and get away with it.
You have a human food tester (as opposed to a cat) to make sure 'they' are not trying to poison you.
You can get a landline, WASA line, electric and gas line in a matter of days not just for yourself but even for your son-in-law's pestering aunt.
You have been able to 'legally' acquire huge pieces of land in choice spots such as the Sundarbans and Cox's Bazar.
You have a mini zoo in your secret garden of your secret country house which includes alligators, deer, peacocks and a few Arabian horses.
You can take your family, friends and of course core sycophants for any official trip abroad.
You don't have to worry about the violence on campuses or malpractice in hospitals because your children study abroad and you can go off to Singapore anytime you want.
You never have to pay phone bills.
You have acquired so many honorary degrees from foreign universities that you feel you are entitled to have Dr before your name.
Your relationship with most of the media is excellent as you own TV channels, newspapers and radio stations.
Most major businesses are controlled by your relatives, friends and student cadres who do the dirty work for you.
You, your family and many of your relatives have multiple visas for most countries in the western hemisphere where you can 'visit' just in case (state of emergency, coup d'état, corruption case filed by opponents).
You still get people to vote for you despite all the times you have failed them because for some inexplicable reason, they still have faith in you.
You have hundreds of people sweating away outside your office, waiting for that signature that will 'push the file' and allow them to sell their land/encroach upon the land of others or public water bodies, get their pension or free their sociopath son from jail.
Your security protocol is like a bridal party replete with dozens of ninja-warriors with Rayban sunglasses, extra Pajeros carrying your personal goons, hairdresser and valet/maid in waiting and a brand new, shiny ambulance.
Your 'commission' from desperate businessmen is not in lakhs but crores.
You can, at the drop of a hat, get all the schoolchildren of the town/village you are visiting, to line up, sing high-pitched welcome songs and throw rose petals on you, despite the scorching sun and outrage of parents.
You can call a hartal just for the heck of it and the streets will be empty the next day. This is because you can get your goons to terrorise the ordinary folk by burning buses, smashing cars and getting a few of them killed.
You can publicly make the most crass, vile and vindictive comments against your opponent and get away with it.
You have a human food tester (as opposed to a cat) to make sure 'they' are not trying to poison you.
You can get a landline, WASA line, electric and gas line in a matter of days not just for yourself but even for your son-in-law's pestering aunt.
You have been able to 'legally' acquire huge pieces of land in choice spots such as the Sundarbans and Cox's Bazar.
You have a mini zoo in your secret garden of your secret country house which includes alligators, deer, peacocks and a few Arabian horses.
You can take your family, friends and of course core sycophants for any official trip abroad.
You don't have to worry about the violence on campuses or malpractice in hospitals because your children study abroad and you can go off to Singapore anytime you want.
You never have to pay phone bills.
You have acquired so many honorary degrees from foreign universities that you feel you are entitled to have Dr before your name.
Your relationship with most of the media is excellent as you own TV channels, newspapers and radio stations.
Most major businesses are controlled by your relatives, friends and student cadres who do the dirty work for you.
You, your family and many of your relatives have multiple visas for most countries in the western hemisphere where you can 'visit' just in case (state of emergency, coup d'état, corruption case filed by opponents).
You still get people to vote for you despite all the times you have failed them because for some inexplicable reason, they still have faith in you.
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