Write to Mita
Dear Mita,
I am a middle aged man working in a large private sector organisation. Recently I had to pull up a colleague of mine for not following certain mandated procedures as laid down by the company. In retaliation she has sent a written complaint against me stating mental harassment on my part. I am totally stunned at this turn of events. I do not know how to deal with this situation. Please help.
Tamim Siddique
Dhanmandi
Dear Tamim,
You need not get too upset about it. Most people don't like being criticized or told that they need improvement. If you have followed procedures in dealing with your colleague then you have nothing to worry about. Moreover if you have a good reputation in the company of being a fair and supportive supervisor, then others will come forward to speak on your behalf. I think a frank talk with this particular staff in the company of someone you trust might be a good idea.
Dear Mita,
I live in an apartment complex. I am friendly with my next door neighbour. We try and help each other out in times of need but of late I get a feeling that I am being taken advantage of. She will call up to inquire whether I would be going out and then ask me to get things for her. This has happened more than once and I do not like it . Unfortunately I am also not that sort of a person who can say a no. What do I do?
Shumona Kabir
Moghbazar
Dear Shumona,
When people live side by side it is expected that they will cooperate and help each other. In the spirit of harmony it is a good practice to take care of each others requirements. However, I agree that one should not take advantage of this situation or cross a certain limit. You should tell her very politely that you don't appreciate being called at certain times. You should also call her and see if she will respond to your request for help. Most importantly draw a line of how far you will go with helping out your neighbour. Finally, I don't think you need to worry too much if you have brought stuff for her once or twice.
Dear Mita,
I am madly in love with my classmate. We both know that after we finish our college education and get started in our careers we would want to get married and settle down together. What is bothering me is that we come from different religious and social backgrounds. My family is very conservative and will not at all be agreeable to this alliance. I feel very helpless and can't think of hurting so many people. Please help me.
Lovestruck
Dear Lovestruck,
Crossing religious and cultural barrier is a big decision which will require a lot of maturity from both of you. Please continue with your education very seriously and meanwhile think and analyze all the pros and cons of such an alliance. After some years if both of you feel the same way about each other then you can take the next step. There is no doubt this will hurt a lot of people on both sides. But if your feelings are true then you will be able to over come all odds.
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