Write to Mita

Dear Mita,
I am a 30-year-old married woman with a two-year old daughter. Even though my husband dotes on me, I've often felt that his parents don't like me much. Ours was a love marriage, and both our parents were initially against it. However, they both agreed to the alliance. My parents have accepted my husband as their son-in-law and are very fond of him. But my in-laws, my mother-in-law in particular, behaves as if I am not even in the house when my husband goes off to work. I thought that things would change after we had our child but that has not been the case. My in-laws love my daughter but they are still quite cold to me. I've tried to address this issue time and again but they've maintained that they have nothing against me. My husband notices their behaviour and even tried to talk to them about it but what can one do when they deny that they have a problem with me. I don't want to have a strained relationship with my in-laws, and would really like a more cordial relationship with them. How do I do that?  
Stressed Daughter-in-law
 

Dear Stressed,
This is sad for you because you seem to care and want to have a good relationship with them. However, some things do not change and one has to accept it. There might be a number of reasons for their behaviour. They might be cold people naturally and cannot demonstrate emotions. Of course they might still hold a grudge and still think that you are not good enough for their son. Whatever is the case, try your best but then if it does not work, so be it. Just maintain a cordial, civil, working relationship and give them no chance to complain.  Make sure this does not create any misunderstanding with your husband. He has an important role to play in this matter.

Dear Mita,
I am a 29-year-old single woman. I am attracted to a male colleague who joined our office around three months back. He seems really nice and we share a great rapport. He seems to like me to but I am not entirely sure about that. My friends keep telling me to take the initiative and just ask him for a date but I am worried that I might end up looking stupid. I mean, shouldn't men be the ones to take the first step? I don't want to look foolish or scare him away, so please help!
Falling in Love
 

Dear in Love,
Yes, usually men do take the first step given our male dominated society. However, there is no harm in finding out if he is interested to spend time with you alone. You can start by giving hints and see if he will take it. Talk about a good book you have read and want to talk about or suggest a good coffee place that have just opened and would be fun to explore. Don't worry, you will not look foolish if you do it in a clever way.