Postscript
Anything that Pays
Parents of toddlers often have dreams about what their offspring will be when they grow up. In our part of the world 'doctor' and 'engineer' have traditionally been the first two on the list. Parents who had a fondness for the arts would concede to 'musician' or 'singer' if their child showed exceptional talent. Even today most people nurture such ambitions for their children although the range has certainly widened with the rise of demand for other kinds of jobs. Children too, are more assertive about what they want and manage to convince their parents (through incessant whining, hunger strikes and emotional blackmailing) that they would rather do something more exciting than save lives or build beautiful buildings.
The idea that people have the choice of being anything they want is certainly exciting. Some people have even gone as far as to create professions nobody would have ever thought of before and taken it to levels unimagined and the origins may date to ancient times.
Professional pencil sharpener.
Professional mourners for instance, have been around for thousands of years. Egyptians had elaborate arrangements for these mourners to grieve for the departed. Professional mourners are mentioned in the Bible. China, Middle East and parts of the Subcontinent have a long tradition of professional mourners. In Rajasthan, India, even today professional mourners called 'Rudalis' are hired to wail hysterically and beat their chests during funerals. Usually the professional mourner is paid according to how convincing the display of grief is, that is, how high in decibels the crying can go to. Unsurprisingly, women have a better chance at becoming professional mourners due to their ability to make such sounds and expend copious amounts of tears.
The sad truth behind the rise of such a strange profession is the perception that there will not be enough people to show their grief over the departed and that kind of looks bad right? In the UK recently people are hiring professional 'sobbers' at £ 45 for a two-hour funeral service. What's more, these actors of grief have to do their homework, meeting with the client (relative of the deceased) to get enough details on the deceased's biography so that they can make appropriate conversation with genuine mourners at the funeral. It all sounds rather morbid but it is keeping many out of the unemployed lists.
Obviously with time other kinds of needs arise leading to the creation of even stranger professions.
In a dog eat dog kind of world that we live in, sometimes all we want is a hug. But for many, even that is too much to ask for. Jackie Samuel is a professional 'snuggler' – charging around $60 for an hour of good, wholesome snuggling in her own home in Rochester, New York. It is strictly a non sexual service and clients are warned not to go beyond a chaste cuddle. The service though weird and requires hugging strange men every week helps to pay for her and her young son's living expenses.
How many times have you wanted to pulverize that number 2 pencil sharpener that keeps breaking the lead? Well that's why you need a professional pencil sharpener like David Rees of Artisanal Pencil Sharpening who will happily and lovingly sharpen your pencil to perfection and deliver them to you along with the shavings and a certificate of authenticity.
Not many people love golf but those who do, do it with a fanaticism few will understand. The most excruciating moment for golfers and golf enthusiasts is when the ball soars high into the sky and then promptly dives into the water. The question is who retrieves it? There are professional golf ball divers who do just that, diving into the water and getting back those balls. You may stop thinking this is a silly job when you know that these people earn up to $100,000 a year doing just this tedious task.
Then there's Jordana Serebrenik, a professional when it comes to persuading an errant pet cat to come back home in New York City. She charges $80 for her services and many a cat owner has paid it willingly to get back their favourite feline.
In Bangladesh where there is a person to do everything, unconventional job opportunities are endless: professional assassin, professional assistant to professional assassin, professional tendon cutter, arsonist, vandal, 'processionist', picketer, rally participant, manhole opener and so on. Thus if your child suddenly says "I want to be a professional con artist when I grow up" don't beat yourself up about your terrible parenting skills. It could be much worse.
Professional pencil sharpener.
Professional mourners for instance, have been around for thousands of years. Egyptians had elaborate arrangements for these mourners to grieve for the departed. Professional mourners are mentioned in the Bible. China, Middle East and parts of the Subcontinent have a long tradition of professional mourners. In Rajasthan, India, even today professional mourners called 'Rudalis' are hired to wail hysterically and beat their chests during funerals. Usually the professional mourner is paid according to how convincing the display of grief is, that is, how high in decibels the crying can go to. Unsurprisingly, women have a better chance at becoming professional mourners due to their ability to make such sounds and expend copious amounts of tears.
The sad truth behind the rise of such a strange profession is the perception that there will not be enough people to show their grief over the departed and that kind of looks bad right? In the UK recently people are hiring professional 'sobbers' at £ 45 for a two-hour funeral service. What's more, these actors of grief have to do their homework, meeting with the client (relative of the deceased) to get enough details on the deceased's biography so that they can make appropriate conversation with genuine mourners at the funeral. It all sounds rather morbid but it is keeping many out of the unemployed lists.
Obviously with time other kinds of needs arise leading to the creation of even stranger professions.
In a dog eat dog kind of world that we live in, sometimes all we want is a hug. But for many, even that is too much to ask for. Jackie Samuel is a professional 'snuggler' – charging around $60 for an hour of good, wholesome snuggling in her own home in Rochester, New York. It is strictly a non sexual service and clients are warned not to go beyond a chaste cuddle. The service though weird and requires hugging strange men every week helps to pay for her and her young son's living expenses.
How many times have you wanted to pulverize that number 2 pencil sharpener that keeps breaking the lead? Well that's why you need a professional pencil sharpener like David Rees of Artisanal Pencil Sharpening who will happily and lovingly sharpen your pencil to perfection and deliver them to you along with the shavings and a certificate of authenticity.
Not many people love golf but those who do, do it with a fanaticism few will understand. The most excruciating moment for golfers and golf enthusiasts is when the ball soars high into the sky and then promptly dives into the water. The question is who retrieves it? There are professional golf ball divers who do just that, diving into the water and getting back those balls. You may stop thinking this is a silly job when you know that these people earn up to $100,000 a year doing just this tedious task.
Then there's Jordana Serebrenik, a professional when it comes to persuading an errant pet cat to come back home in New York City. She charges $80 for her services and many a cat owner has paid it willingly to get back their favourite feline.
In Bangladesh where there is a person to do everything, unconventional job opportunities are endless: professional assassin, professional assistant to professional assassin, professional tendon cutter, arsonist, vandal, 'processionist', picketer, rally participant, manhole opener and so on. Thus if your child suddenly says "I want to be a professional con artist when I grow up" don't beat yourself up about your terrible parenting skills. It could be much worse.
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