The Struggle of Shopping With Mothers

Unless you are a strong independent female allowed to navigate the hazardous shopping mall by herself or just have a like-minded female you can count on, you are burdened with the unavoidable task of having your mother tag along.

To some, it may prove to be a bonding session with your beloved ammu but such is not the case for us teenage human beings.

LET THE WAR BEGIN
It is my mother's favourite hobby to oppose any and every item I point out. Even if it's something I've wanted forever. However, she will go to extreme lengths to force her choice on me. War ensues. Undoubtedly mothers are programmed to be ignorant of the fact that everyone has different styles and tastes. Being trendy is a problem. So is going vintage. Dear mother, 70s' fashion is having a revival, I'm not "old fashioned" if I buy flared jeans.

PUT A LABEL ON IT
They are quick to dismiss anything that flatters you as "indecent". Long, loose, frilly, colourful, patterned are some of the thousand criteria buzzing around in their heads. I swear they have a filter attached to their eyes. They only see what matches their criteria. We see everything else.

SUPER INTENSE CARDIO SESSION
A new-found burst of energy courses through their bodies as soon as they step into the mall. They speed from shop to shop, upstairs, downstairs and back again. Makes us wonder if they have a secret stash of Red Bull hidden somewhere. These are the times I vigorously wish that Bangladesh get on the online shopping bandwagon quicker. Because a shopping spree with mother is as tiring as running a marathon. At least, you have a sense of direction during a marathon. 

I LOST MY MOMMY
We march out of a store, ready to move on and start the hunt again in another store, but look back only to realise our mother is not behind us. We venture into the deep jungle of clothing again and spot them engrossed in a saree store. This happens approximately at every twist and turn.

A LESSON ON BARGAINING
Spotting a "30% off" sticker plastered on the price tag is a pleasant surprise. But asking for discounts for each and every item is not so pleasant. My mother literally lists down all the credit cards until the shopkeepers grow tired of saying "No offer" and deduct a small portion from the price. There, there, a happy customer. Then there are times when mothers teach us the art of bargaining. The result is a long line of annoyed customers waiting behind the cash counter shooting us dirty looks and we have nothing to do but pretend we are oblivious to this determined woman's actions.

After an extremely energetic and fulfilling day, we either decide to be rebellious and refrain from buying anything of our mother's choice or we come to a mutual agreement to get something we both like (READ: what we pretend to like because at this point we are physically and emotionally drained).

Brace yourselves, Eid frenzy is right around the corner. Days spent on fruitless browsing ahead.

Mashiyat Nayeem has a mutual disliking for stupidity and paper-wasters alike. Be an anomaly and send her a paper free mail at mashiyat.nayeem@gmail.com