What about your friends back home?

Right after O Levels were done with and we stepped into our magical summer, friends started dropping like flies left and right over the next two years. Most of us in our school had been together for at least 10 years, so getting used to depressing farewells became a major part of our lives. Missing someone is just the mere starting line. This is for those who don't understand how we actually felt back home.

When you are the one moving away, you are mentally prepared for a brand new environment. You'll be seeing new eager faces, learning new things, experiencing things different from what we're experiencing every day. The rest of us, who are still here, don't get to have a new environment. We don't get to see new faces. It's because we're not in some place new, but the same old. We have to fit in, all over again, in the same routine but now with a different take on things. 

Back in 11th grade, when my main friend circle got smaller and a few of my close friends were the only ones remaining in school, we found it hard to fit in. Even though we were in the same place with the same faces, we thought we were lost. New friends were not what we were looking for, because after so many years together, we thought we knew everyone of the batch inside out and we simply couldn't replace the ones who left. We were depressed. Being 16, friends were one of the top priorities, as is the norm, but I remember having a conversation with a friend about how jaded we were becoming and that honestly scared me. 

All the friends who left were obviously facing hardships – making friends who come from a completely different background, dealing with the weather and most importantly learning to live a life without a helping hand. These things made them have less free time than we expected them to have. Meanwhile, we sat at home with our phones in our hands, waiting for them to reply to our texts, and maybe even get a call from them. Nevertheless, as interesting as their new experiences were, most of us here were secretly jealous every single time they shared a story with us.

As months went by, some of the people we thought we knew inside out became our new best friends. At this point, the jealousy reciprocated from the friends abroad. They may not have liked the fact that we were making new friends; they felt as though they were being replaced. Distance and time were things we couldn't do anything about. Truth is, we didn't replace any of our old friends. Life goes on and we too, learnt to adapt. 

Both the groups, the ones here and the ones abroad were missing out on things and most importantly, missing each other. Summer meant everyone's back home. Luckily for us, nine months apart didn't do much harm to our friendship but just putting it out there, you're not the only ones suffering; we do too.