How to be a good parent

Prof Dr M Karim Khan

One of my junior colleagues, having one small kid, asked me, "Sir how to be a good parent and what are the impact on the mind of a child if parents are not reasonable?" I found this question very important, pertinent and interesting. We always expect that our children should be very good in all respect. They should have all the good qualities and should full-fill all desires of parents. On the contrary, we often forget how we are behaving with them. Do we have all the qualities that an ideal parent should have? The following attitude and behaviour of parents are expected by the children from their parents. -True love and affection -A gentle cuddle, a little encouragement, appreciation, approval or even a smile can go a long way to boost the confidence and well-being of our children -Love them unconditionally; don't force them to be the one you think they should be in order to earn your love. Let them know that you will always love them in all circumstances. -Listen to your children with all interest and incorporate yourself in his or her life. -Create an atmosphere so that they can come to you with a problem — whether small or large -Help them feel safe -Respect their privacy, as you expect in case of yours -Don't argue with your spouse in front of them and never abuse or pick up quarrels with the maids in their presence -Avoid favouritism -Give up your bad habits e.g. smoking, alcohol intake, gambling, quarreling, coming back home late at night etc. -Encourage responsibility -Teach them what is right or wrong -Ensure their healthy lifestyle -Praise your child often and for every good work -Avoid comparison with other children or with other siblings; every individual is unique and separate -Avoid criticism of the child but teach good behaviour and manner -Be consistent, control temper -Spend good time with each child individually -Try to find some time to go out with family for travel, shopping or dinner However, the most important thing that any parent can give their child is a sense of being loved and the most important. Our every attitude, behaviour influence children's mental and physical growth and development. If we do our duties properly, we obviously can expect good outcome. Parents are the best guide and teacher and family is the best school.
The writer is a Professor of Paediatrics at Community Based Medical College (CBMC), Mymensingh. E-mail: mmukkhan@gmail.com